Dear reader and follow survivor,

As tempting as it may be to skip what appears to be an introduction, please don’t.

I know, I know, I too hate reading extra crap and like to get to the point…. And since I hate fluff, I did us both a favor and made sure not to include any.  Everything included in this guide is necessary information to ensure you have the best chance possible to capture the ever elusive happiness you’ve been seeking.



Survivors To Alivers’ sole purpose is to support trauma survivors on a healing journey which results in holistic restoration. Founded by Elizabeth Joy, the Survivor To Aliver concept was inspired by Elizabeth’s experience of seeking a better life after suffering multiple traumas including sexual abuse over a span of several years as an adolescent and rape at age sixteen. 

Please Read

StoreBookElizabeth began with writing “You Survived… Now What? A Road Map to Reclaiming Life” in effort to provide an answer to the ultimate question, “How Do I Heal?” The book outlines the Survivors ToAlivers six-stage model for healing which includes twenty-four exercises to assist readers in pursuing the life they desire step-by-step.

After receiving feedback from hundreds of readers seeking the opportunity to connect with others on the journey of healing, Elizabeth recently developed the Survivors ToAlivers online community and which includes an extension of support services and tools to offer a comprehensive system survivors can immerse themselves in as they pursue restoration. The Aliver Platform includes your road map for your journey, bathroom breaks along the way where you can also gas up, while a hanging out with locals and post reviews of the points of interest. You can only receive the full benefits of the Aliver Platform when all mechanism are used congruently. While one may choose to engage in one or a mix of a few of these offerings, This guide was developed to provide direction as to how and when to use each tool for an optimal experience yielding the best possible results based on known research (results are not guaranteed).

ALIVERS-SURVIVORS (2)It is important to note that the healing journey is not a linear process. As you will read in the Introduction of “You Survived… Now What? A Road Map to Reclaiming Life,” you will ebb and flow in and out of stages throughout your journey. Keep this in mind as you progress through the recommended exercises listed in this guide. This is not a race. It’s not about getting to “the end.” It’s not about the destination. This is why we refer to this process as a journey. There isn’t a right or wrong way to go about this. There isn’t a time frame in which you should have completed this process or completed any one stage within this process. As you move forward you will get a sense as to where you are and when you are ready to challenge yourself to take another step. Rely on the support of other members, your life coach, and/or your counselor for support in knowing how to move forward.

Aliver Terminology

Check Your Map

The Book

  1. You Survived… Now What?  A Road Map to Reclaiming Life” is a self-help book which outlines a six-stage model for healing.  Those of us who have experienced trauma know not only of the immediate symptoms such as grief and sadness, but we also know the effects of trauma can linger on for years. When we experience trauma, we do whatever we can to survive it. We all have our own way of coping; some begin to isolate, some turn to alcohol and drugs, others may begin to eat, hoard, or turn to violence as a way to process the pain. We look up and years have passed since the trauma yet we’re still acting out these behaviors in our everyday life. We’re stuck in survivor mode. If you want to learn how to conquer barriers you face as a result of your past and reclaim a life of happiness and peace, this book is for you.

Bathroom Break


  1. It is likely that more than a few thoughts will be triggered while you are reading the book. Journaling is a great way to process those thoughts. Though journaling in the ledger of your choice is an option, members of Survivors ToAlivers online support community have access to an online journal which can be viewed by and commented on by other members who are “supporters.” In addition to the aforementioned benefits of journaling, using the online journal increases your engagement of support from other who can relate to your experience.Survivors ToAlivers will soon be upgrading our journaling technology which will allow you to select which entries you want to keep completely private.  If you are journaling about a subject you are not comfortable with others having access to, it is recommended to do so in a ledger of your choice which you can privately store.

Trip Advice

 Support Services

  1. Survivors To Alivers support services include the Healing Exchange and Support Tank.
    1. Hang Out With The Locals (Healing Exchange)
      1. The Healing Exchange is a live-streamed online gathering facilitated by a Survivors ToAlivers staff member which encourages discussions related to members’ experiences working through the Six-Stage healing model. Participation in the Healing Exchange offers an opportunity to discuss questions, challenges, concerns, and general thoughts related to the journey of healing.  It is designed to encourage the development of courage and confidence through the comradery offered in a group setting.  It is offered weekly and lasts for one hour. These sessions are not scripted and topics are decided on by members as the session unfolds.  As a result, no two sessions are the same.  Additionally, as you make progress in your healing, your viewpoint and perspective will change.  Participation in the Healing Exchange is encouraged throughout your journey as each encounter is a new experience.
    2. Read and Post Reviews (Support-Tank)
      1. Survivors To Alivers has created a forum which includes discussion topics specific to work prescribed in “You Survived… Now What? A Road Map to Reclaiming Life.” This guide outlines specific posts to make throughout your journey.  Because the healing journey is not linear, it is recommended that you revisit discussion topics you have previously posted in as new experiences present themselves.  Additionally, new members are joining daily.  You may not have seen their posts when you last visited that thread.  Revisiting these posts allows you to benefit from new insights being shared and offers and opportunity for you to be a support to someone who may not be as far along the journey as you.  Lastly, in addition to posting as directed in Support-Tank categories specific to exercises outlined in this guide, it is recommended you engage in discussions in the various other categories in the Tank covering a variety of other topics related to the journey of healing.

Gas Up

Professional Services

  1. Depending on the extent of your trauma, pursing the journey of healing with the support of a professional may be necessary. Generally speaking, some professional support is recommended as most trauma survivors are not equipped to maneuver this process alone.  None of the products and services Survivors To Alivers offers were developed to replace any professional support you are currently receiving.  In fact, our services compliment and can be used in conjunction with those services.  Efforts you make in completing exercises outlined in this guide can be discussed and reviewed in sessions with your counselor/therapist.  If you are not currently engaged in professional services, it is highly recommended that, at minimum, you complete a needs assessment with a Survivors To Alivers life coach to determine whether counseling services are recommended.  If so, your coach will make effort to provide direction on how to connect with a counselor in your area.  If it is deemed that counseling is not currently necessary, coaching services prove beneficial in offering an opportunity to discuss challenges and concerns along your healing journey.
    1. Coaching – Coaching does not require a mental health diagnosis and is focused on identifying goals, outlining barriers to those goals, and empowering the client to unlock and maximize their potential to achieve the life they seek. Generally speaking, it is helpful to start off with weekly sessions.  Your coach is continually assessing your progress and will make recommendations to increase or decrease frequency when necessary.  There are specific recommendations for topics to cover in your coaching sessions made throughout this guide, however, you and your coach will determine how best to spend your time during each session.  Additionally, as previously stated, if at any point during your participation in coaching services it is deemed that your needs are beyond the scope of life coaching, you will be referred to counseling services.
    2. Counseling – Counseling/therapy requires a mental health diagnosis and is focused on addressing symptoms related to that diagnosis. These diagnoses include a more significant level of mental and emotional challenges which often involve major depression, personality disorders, and substance abuse.  In some cases, medication may be necessary in addition to treatment services. If you are participating in counseling services, please follow your counselor’s recommendations as it relates to your mental health needs including frequency of sessions.  There are specific recommendations for topics to discuss you’re your counselor made throughout this guide, however, you and your counselor will determine how best to spend your time during each session.


Stop 1: Survivor

Coping, remaining alive and functional after a trauma


Stop 2: Depriver

Withholding healing, enjoyment, and life from self, knowingly or unknowingly

Stop 3: Deriver

Reviewing the trauma(s), how one responded to it, and how it affected their life


Stop 4: Contriver

Using knowledge gained from research and reflection to develop a plan to become an Aliver

Stop 5: Striver

Implementing changes outlined in your plan in effort to become an Aliver

Stop 6: Aliver

No longer being defined by the past, implementing positive coping mechanisms when faced with new challenges, and living life as more than a survivor

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